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Tues, Jan 25, 2000 at 20:00:23 (GMT)






Hi Marianne!
I watched the pre-recorded broadcast and it was the last straw. And not just for me, someone said to me 'I've never felt so negative before'. One thing, this wasn't the first pre-recorded broadcast. The video started with m saying, with an expressionless face 'This is about you' (long pause) 'This is about me' (long pause) 'This is about life' (long pause) all while making strange gestures with his hands. He didn't seem very lively to me. In the video he said something like ... with each life, if you can make a little progress, that's good enough ... I don't think that was the exact wording but that was the meaning. I think in this same video he said 'it all ends' when you die. I read a post somewhere of some 'Satsang' he 'gave' in the old days where he went on and on about reincarnation, basically not just saying it happens but giving details. Years later he said 'something continues'. A few months ago he said 'Is there reincarnation, in my opinion ... NO'. Later (no in the same video) he said 'What happens when you die? I don't know. At least I'm being honest (for a change)'. Another time someone asked him what will happen when he (m) dies. He said 'nothing' then said 'It'll go on , I don't see how!' (I guess he meant the teaching of the Knowledge techniques, it sounded like another put-down). But I digress. There was some footage of him walking around (I think in slow motion), at one point with one of his sons I think, the other person was partially obscured. There seemed to be some implied meaning there. There was some footage of some ocean waves, I think in slow motion, pretty colors. Back to 'it all ends (when you die)', he said that after saying something about how people talk about how bad things are going to happen with the millenium ... and then said but when you die 'it all ends'. I read a post of him talking in the old days about how at the end of the year 2000 (the real turn of the millenium) there will be calamity and the only people left will be people who have this Knowledge. I don't knowif it was in the video, but he said recently something about how knowledge enables you to experience God 'as much as is humanly possible'. Hmmm, sounds like he's backing off on some claims there. I'm having a hard time remembering what else he said, I was distracted by the Don Quixote sculture and the painting of the seagull and waves and the piano (wondering how much they cost). There was some music that he wrote, performed, etc. etc. It was ok, I think he's getting better at that hobby, but I've heard much better premie music. I wouldn't say it deeply moved me, I would much rather listen to Chopin. I wonder how good a musician he thinks he is. Oh, and recently he admitted that his watch collection is 'a bad habit'. So is he going stop it, sell it and put the money to good use? And what does that say about his other collections (expensive suits, houses, cars, etc.)? Another thing, recently it was announced that $450,000 was raised for the Amaroo place to put in running water. The idea is that people will stay in tents, not him and his loved ones of course. However, there won't be a program there in 2000 because things aren't ready yet. People have already stayed there in tents when it first started (for about $350 or so), so I don't get that. For $350 you got to stay there, sleeping in a tent in the middle of a mowed ex-cow pasture, possibly with poisonous snakes around (we were warned about snakes) and not having to commute and maybe you got to see him more. Now I wonder, will commuting to a hotel be an option in the future? How much we they want for tent rental? On the Jay Leno show, Jay recently showed this ad for a vacation package, one thing that was provided was a tent! He and the audience thought it was a rediculous scam. Now some premies might think I'm just a 'spaced out' premie, but you know, I like the techniques and I cherish love and peace and life (not this love or this peace or this life (or that place), no just love and peace and live). And I don't see what seeing a Don Quixote sculpture or listening to new age music has to do with it. Isn't it simple, isn't it about me feeling my life? And what about the poor premies who can't afford to go to Australia or see pay-per-view broadcasts? Yes, many cannot afford that. And what about people who don't like new age music? Regarding the techniques, I have some thoughts regarding how they were changed after many years, like .. how did Shri Hans teach Maharaji the techniques, the lack of quality control, the rationalle m gave for why they weren't taught properly in the first place ('would you have done it?') but I won't go on and on now about it.

5 Brighter than 1000 suns as seen through night vision goggles
4 As bright as the lights on Maharaji's jet
3 As bright as a 60 watt light bulb
2 As bright as a pile of burning ghi on a swinging arti tray
1 As bright as the inner light as seen by the third eye