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Date:

Friday, Mar 30, 2001

From:

Janet

Email:

To:

Everyone

Subject:

Janet's take on Catweasel
Message:
...as for catweasle, i figure, if this place is like a virtual coffeehouse, opened by ex'es, for ex's, open all night, we never close, bottomless cuppa java, run a tab, pay when you can, browse the library, recite at the open mike, hold forth at impromptu roundtables, exchanging high intellectual opinions--
if that's us, then cat must be the feral alley cat who forages in our dumpster, attracted by the enticing food smells and warmth spilling out the back door, and longs to find the courage to come in and be petted, but he's just too rough and hardened by the streets to be able to trust anyone and never learned how to act civilized around humans. we've tried, but he is what he is. he can't stay away and he can't trust enough to know how to be, so we let him feed off our garbage and accept that he's just there. we put better food out for him, sometimes, but he just snatches it and drags it off through the filth and gnaws on it at a distance. and being what he is, sometimes our more compassionate patrons have tried to go out and approach him, and have gotten slashed for their efforts. even our cook has surprised him in the dumpster when taking out the garbage, and has gotten gored as the cat came tearing up out of the depths and scrambled to escape. we forgive it. its his nature. he's feral. he just doesnt know how else to be. he's desperate and hungry and he's attracted by our glow. and he's so afraid of us, the only thing he dares feed on is our garbage.

what do we do? lock the dumpster? get a compactor? shoot him? trap him and have him put to sleep?

if we cut off his food, he'll only hunt down the anonymice and feed on them. do we want that?

he seems to trust cerise. i say, fine-- let her adopt him and take him home. he can sit in her lap while she watches videos and satellite broadcasts and meditate with her later, when she gets the techniques.

meanwhile, your cat scratches and abi's will heal up with attention and bandaging, and the caf� will expand. business is booming. let's go back inside and resume our discussions, shall we?

Janet

5 Brighter than 1000 suns as seen through night vision goggles
4 As bright as the lights on Maharaji's jet
3 As bright as a 60 watt light bulb
2 As bright as a pile of burning ghi on a swinging arti tray
1 As bright as the inner light as seen by the third eye