Well said. In my post below, I was trying to point out that whatever I experienced in meditation was almost irrelevant. Satsang, service and meditation were what we did no matter how we felt because "grace follows effort." If I didn't experience anything, it was just a cloudy day. God was on the planet and that was more than enough to be happy about.
The twisted part, as if that wasn't enough, was the "dust" that kicked-up when no matter how hard I tried, I wasn't feeling anything. I always blamed myself, vowed to dig deeper and resorted to "beg to Guru Maharaji, pray to Guru Maharaji for that grace." (His words, not mine.) It was all okay because he described that exact scenario of effort stirring up muck that, when it settles, everything becomes clear!
I guess my point is that even my own happiness or lack thereof was irrelevant because my life was no longer my own - I'd given it to him. Surrender is surrender. The ONLY thing that mattered was being on the boat. Remember that one!