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The question(s) answered, I think.......
 Posted by: NAR
 Date: 12/11/2004, 10:24:03
 Original URL: Click here (However, the link may be stale.)

OK, it's a bit long, but all this nostalgia (old music) got me to thinking that we SHOULD answer those nagging questions in "Who is Guru Maharaji".... so here 'tis:

Who is guru maharaji?
A: A kid who has/had delusions of grandeur.

Who is the artist of creation?
A: The question should be "what," not "who." At any rate, it's clearly evolution after a rather large bang.  Although the word "large" had no meaning at the "time" since space and time didn't really exist..... but let's not go there, I have a headache at the moment.

That's the question you must ask
A: Silly person, that's two QUESTIONS, not a single question.  I have asked "them," however.

Ask til you know the answer(s)
A: I do, thank you!

What is the purpose of your living?
A: To live...... however I see fit, thanks for asking.

What is the meaning of your breath
A: Well, I don't know that it has any meaning other than to keep oxygen flowing to the cellular structures, thus keeping your body alive.

And death
A: Silly question..... end of life.... worn out, completed, worm food, etc.

Is it to serve?
A: No!  Well, ok, we serve each other to a degree, but I don't live-to-serve anymore than I live-to-work.  I work-to-LIVE!

Why do we deserve this precious human body?
A: Ahhhhhh, because we were evolved here on this planet and this collection of molecules just happenend to get together and become "you."  Another really straighforward answer would simply be: Because your parents had relations and you were conceived.  Good enough?

Since history began,
A: History didn't "begin," TIME began. But, I won't quibble.  What's your point?

We have killed our fellow man,
A: Well, that's true.  But, if they'd leave ME alone, I'd do the same. I think the question should be, "Was there a reason for killing another man?"  But, it wouldn't help your point, now would it?

Has there ever been a time of peace?
A: Probably not.  Even volcanic activity can be considered "violence" depending upon whether your ant-hill happens to be in the lava path.  Certainly, a supernova would be considered violent and they happen all of the time throughout the universe..... with likely TONS of death and destruction in their wake.  Hey.... bacteria deserve to live, too.  What? Too simple a lifeform to consider in this discussion?  Bigot!

Can he make this sickness cease?
A: If "he" is GMJ, then probably not, since he ain't no doctor! Our medical technology gets better every single day. So I'd say.... YES.... given some time and a well defined target for the efforts of those highly trained and qualified people of medicine.

Who is Guru Maharaji?
A: You already asked that question, silly person!

What is a master of perfection?
A: I haven't got a clue, since there is nothing that is apparently as perfect as you seem to believe.  Actually, since perfection (the strictest interpretation of perfection, that is) doesn't actually exist....... I'd have to say that anyone called a master of it would be a..... uhhhhh..... scheister? 

That's the question you must ask
A: I told you already.... that is TWO questions!  Get a clue..... "A QUESTION" is a single sentence with a single question mark behind it!  "QUESTIONS" are multiple sentences with same. 

Ask til you know the answer(s)
A: I did and I do!

What keeps the universe in motion
A: NOW THAT is a great question...... are you really ready for the answer?  Go take a couple of courses in physics and astrophysics and we can really get a down-home discussion going on this one.  There isn't enough time left in your song for the answer..... sorry.

Can problems be solved by devotion
A: Nope!  Well, not your type of devotion anyway.  People devoted to their work in medicine, science, technology, life skills and others will do so, but not someone that lays their head at the feet of anyone unschooled in such disciplines.

Is there truely a master plan?
A: NO!  We've told you a million times, there is no such thing as a Great Right Wing Conspiracy!  Cut it out, already!

Can this planet be saved by man
A: Oh.... I hope so.... I truely do hope so!

Watch who'll be feeding all the people
A: I'm waiting!  So the question now becomes WHEN WILL HE FEED ALL THE PEOPLE?  Actually, the U.S. gives away alot of food.... not enough for everyone, but alot!

Watch who will wash away the tears
A: Again, WAITING!  I haven't seen anyone do this, yet!  Well, that isn't entirely true.  My parents washed away my tears, my wife understands my silly foibles and faults, my friends are always sympathetic, too.
Watch the fruit(s) of his knowledge
A: I have and, trust me on this, they ARE fruits!  Anyone gained liberation yet?  I'm waiting!

Cast away your fears
A:  I did!  I stopped fearing the "breaking into a million pieces," "rotten vegetable truck" and other things if I didn't practice. 

Who is guru maharaji
A: Man.... you ARE repetitive, aren't you?

Who is the lover of your soul?
A: This one is really easy! I'll assume that by "soul," you mean me!  My wife and my child and all of those that present me with their unconditional love on a daily basis....... my extended family and probably a number of friends.  Thanks for asking..... it's always nice to remind oneself of who it is that loves them so much throughout their lives.

That's the question you must ask
A: Oh for pete sake!  THAT IS TWO QUESTIONS!  You guys never learn!

The answer(s) you must know
A: I do, thank goodness, I DO!


5 Brighter than 1000 suns as seen through night vision goggles
4 As bright as the lights on Maharaji's jet
3 As bright as a 60 watt light bulb
2 As bright as a pile of burning ghi on a swinging arti tray
1 As bright as the inner light as seen by the third eye

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