First of all, many people on this site have taken the step of using their real names. It's hard, knowing there are Fakiranand styled and other premies that want to hurt anyone who speaks negatively about Rawat. By no means am I implying that EVERY premie feels this way. I would guess there are a good many who simply ignore us and also feel people who have left do have a right to speak about their experiences.

You are right. There could be someone here filled with Hate against Rawat. I would guess the odds are there is. But, that doesn't make it a "hate group" as premies are so fond of labeling us. We are not all the same. Not at all. I personally do not like Rawat, I think he is a fake. I think he has treated premies especially, even more so than ex's, in an uncaring and exploitive way. But to let that fill me with hate? I guess perhaps honestly I went through a stage like that. But I am over any hate I felt. It is an ugly destructive feeling. But I do feel things he has done and is doing are worth exposing. That is not the same as hate. It really is more like love, you may not be able to see it, but I would say the majority of posters here post more out of wanting to HELP premies than to hurt Rawat.

I know at least that is how it is for me.

You would also be suprised, I think, that I would stand up and say you have every right to speak out on the internet or anywhere about your feelings that we are wrong, and your conviction that Rawat is a great master. I feel also that Moonies and Krishna and Mormons and Scientologists all have the right to exist and speak their minds. I also believe you and these other groups are comprised of mostly members who really feel they have found something very special and are protective of it. I once was. If someone was to make a law to outlaw premies right to practice their religion ( the group is listed as a non proft religous group) I would actually speak out in public that it would be wrong to outlaw you. That isn't hate. A lot of us still feel love toward premies we knew or know. My opinion is you are just being decieved. I want to help. But, I feel you and I both have every right to speak our minds ( if that term no longer is offensive) and hearts. Hate from premies or ex premies is not going to do anything but come back and slap the individual in the face.

Does that mean I will sit down and shut up? No. It might be the best thing for my emotional health to do that. But I also feel a conviction to speak what I feel is true when I want to. I feel you, dear premie, have the same right to defend your beliefs and what you love. We live in a free society and I do not want the government deciding what anyone is allowed to believe. That would be a worse evil.

I the airport I came across a member of the Falong Gong. I feel he too is being decieved. He showed me photos of the acrocities committed against his group in China. I was appalled. I told him I felt he had every right to practice his beliefs though I feel his beliefs are erroneous and told him so. I also offered to buy him water or food to show that I did care about HIM as an individual, it was the organization he is caught up in I feel is a trap. I feel no differently about that than a premie. I am glad though that premies have not been tortured like that Falong Gong.

I hope that you can see that although I have a very different opinion about my former guru and your present master that I do not Hate you. There is one premie I can think of I harbor anger toward, and that is because I think he has betrayed my trust and the truth on the Jagdeo subject. I am more angry at him than Rawat, who did not know me from a hole in the wall and perhaps if he had he might have acted on Jagdeo sooner. And of course I harbor a wish that Jagdeo would be locked up and I could know it happened.

I do not at all think all premies are bad people. Many have been among the nicest people I have met, even nicer I have seen if they get out, because they are no longer under any pressure to ignore the realities of Rawat's past and present. They become more genuinely themselves. And I think their love is allowed to emerge very genuinely without a tacit message that premies have a secret that makes them more valuable than other citizens of our planet.

I hope you are able to at least see I am coming from a sincere place. I know many premies are also sincere. I was. I hope you will consider painting us all with the "hate group" label is inaccurate. I do agree that there may be ex's who do hate Rawat, but I don't think it is even most. I know so many who never have posted here, they think he is a fake, but they don't even have the desire to get into it. It is what so many premies ask of us, why don't you move on with your life. Most of us have, I know I spent years without thinking about it at all very moved on till I found the site. But I felt an ethical and personal need to speak the truth publicly and go on the record. Many, many people have written to thank me.

But if you knew me, you'd see I am not a hate filled person. I think if you knew a lot of us you would see that. At least I hope you would allow that possibilty.

My best wishes for a happy and healthy wonderful life.

Susan