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Editor's Note: Recently on the Internet I read that prison directors do the same thing with their problem prisoners - they trade 'em around. Howevever, the directors need to be honest in their description of just how much of a problem a prisoner is otherwise the directors will get hip and refuse to trade.


Thurs, Nov 18, 1999 at 19:35:55 (EST)







ashram recruiting
I remember alan imbarrato-god, was he a wierd, hateful intense man. An ex est trainer whose specialty was confronting people (In est he would have been known as an 'ESTHOLE') he loved to bother people and recruit them for the ashram. It sure would be interesting to get his perspective on some of these things. Also, some of the things he saw m say and do would be very interesting.

Anyway, he told this friend of mine that he had to surrender to m and the only way he could do it was by moving in the ashram.They got in this arguement about whether or not moving in the ashram meant you were really surrendered. Imbarrato says that if you move in the ashram, m will move you around in this mystical sort of fashion. Whatever is best for you will suddenly appear, or manifest, as they used to say. M will magically move you around the organization and the country, by having ashram coordinators (who are surrendered to M) tell you where to go. The premie says he doesn't believe this. He says if the ashram coordinator tells you to do something, that's all it is-one premie telling another premie what to do, not some divine, mystical direction from m. Imbarrato tells the guy he's confused, and asks him to go to this ashram retreat where he might get some 'clarity' on the issue, and then join the ashram.

So, the guy goes to the ashram retreat at some college in New England.On the first morning he goes down to the cafeteria to get some breakfast and mistakenly sits down at a table with all of the ashram coordinators. He didn't know they were coordinators-they didn't know he wasn't even in the ashram. The coordinators assume he's one of them and start talking shop about the premies in the ashram, about how wierd or sick some of them are. They start swapping premies from ashram to ashram, trading them like they were baseball cards.I'll take the crazy guy if you take the sister with candida. If you take the gay sister in your ashram, I'll take the sister who never works. We'll give you a nice guy who runs the video projector to get him away from his crazy mother who wants to deprogram him, if you give us a good house painter for our company. This goes on and on, with these arrogant idiots trading premies, trying to make it look like it's all m's direction. The guy is laughing his head off, but trying not to show it, as these guys are totally proving his point.At one point the coordinators trade one guy out of Philly to Conn-he can run the video projector, so they decide that they will make it look like a promotion to him, so they say that they will call him the 'Communication Director' in the Conn. comunity. Meanwhile, the coordinators figure out this guy isn't one of them, and politeley ask him to leave the table, as this is 'for their ears only'. The guy leaves, but is laughing so hard to himself he figures that the whole trip was worth it just for the comic relief,plus the fact that they played their hand and showed him how it's really done.

End of Story:

The guy sees the 'video' premie (New Commnuications Director). goes up to him and says that he has a feeling that the premie will have a sudden new service advancement and will be moved to New England in the near future. Sure enough, it's announced at the next satsang-the video premie never figured it out, I guess he chalked it up to grace. Also, he goes back to Imbarrato and tells him the story about the breakfast table 'trading club'. Imbarrato, reaching deep inside for the party line, responds that the premie only saw what he wanted to see, and that if a pickpocket meets a saint, he only sees his pockets.

Now, that's a good story!

5 Brighter than 1000 suns as seen through night vision goggles
4 As bright as the lights on Maharaji's jet
3 As bright as a 60 watt light bulb
2 As bright as a pile of burning ghi on a swinging arti tray
1 As bright as the inner light as seen by the third eye